New Nike Running App Tells You What You’re Really Running From

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New Nike Running App Tells You What You’re Really Running From

by The Onion 2:29 mins

New Nike Running App Tells You What You’re Really Running From

by The Onion 2:29 mins

The new app pinpoints the unique existential angst at the core of each runner’s workout routine. Then it motivates with personalized reminders like, “Your career is stalling out” and “Your family hates you.”

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